Navigating the Waters

     This place is a little bit of bullshit. But the more I keep my mouth shut the more I seem to learn. There are some ladies in here that are just shit stirrers. I need to keep clear of them for sure. Not keep clear of them but not tell them my stories because they have evil intentions. I didn't see that at first but everything is an issue. They complain about staff, they complain about other residents, they complain that nobody does their fair share, but I thought the whole point of us being here was to build relationships with each other. I don't trust anyone here but Kristen. Jolene is nice but she's fruity and going through some hard stuff on her own. I like my bathroom mate, she's pretty cool but spends most of her time in her room. Cheryl is nice but I think she steals shit. But I'm pretty sure that Dawn is the one who drank my sprite, popped the seals on my waters and stole my pants. She's a petty jealous bitch. 

    Regardless, I am feeling good about being here. I just need to learn a few things. 

    I'm tired, really tired. I don't want to go to work tomorrow. UGHHHHHH! but until I find something else this is where I am. I applied for several really good jobs and now I just wait. If I got another job tomorrow I wouldn't go back to the store. It's not the worst, Shannon is super cool, the customers are funny for the most part. I love facing the shelves and using the cool register. BUT I just can't do full time right now. It's too much while also trying to work on these things inside myself. 

    I'm ready to work but there is no fucking way I'm going to get through 5 days in a row. No way. I slept last night with no dreams at all. Frowny Face. I love my dreams, I look forward to my dreams without them I kind of feel like I missed seeing my home. That's probably weird but it's how I feel. Like a kitty stretching I love journaling too. I'm supposed to make a list of things that truly bring me joy.

Spending time with my kiddos

Sucking my thumb

journaling 

folding and organizng my room. I love it.

And Chris. 

    I'm gonna go in and take a nap, maybe I'll have some dreams after all.