Enough already

 I'm sick of thinking about the past. That's all these girls do is look back at the past. I know you have to deal with that shit but I'm sick of it. I need a break from all the heartbreak from these chicks. What is the deal? I just want to look forward but they say that you can't look forward if you are carrying things from the past. Ugh. I've told my story so many times to so many people. What if I'm not still carrying the shit, you know what I mean. I don't want to feel sorry for myself because my mom died. I don't want to whine and cry because my daddy made me feel a certain kind of way. I just want to live my life now. That's what I need to talk to a therapist about. Anyway.

Yesterday morning was great, last night was weird. Is tonight going to be like that? I guess I'll see. I wish I would have gotten your call earlier. I was asleep and woke up to answer but before I could find my phone you were gone. I'm tired again. I think I took way too much of that medicine that is supposed to help me relax. It made me sleep almost all goddamn day. I will be ready for a day time call tomorrow though. I'm excited about that. I miss our day time conversations. 

My tummy is killing me today. And I went out and bought toilet paper and my bathroom buddy has used it all and I just put it in there on Friday. What the fuck are you doing to go through toilet paper like that. I mean what the fuck is up with that. I won't buy anymore or if I do I'm keeping it in my room. Fuck that. Anyway I hope your day is going good. I'm gonna go take a nap.

PS there is a chick here all sick and crying all day like a baby. She tried to blame it on a ring that she couldn't get off her finger but she's bullshit. She's coming down and if they find out she's been using she's gonna get the boot. End of story. Who would fuck up this opportunity. She must be pretty far gone. Is it making me want to use? Hell no. It's reminding me why I don't do crank anymore.

I need glasses so fucking bad. I can't see shit anymore.